May 30, 2016 by jorthusbooks
Plopping on the ground to relieve my feet for a while proved unproductive. All I did was run through mental scenarios that I could think to explain my circumstances; the best I came up with was possibly amnesia.
It could also be a hallucination. My mind split off into so many excuses that I had to give the exercise up out of the pure pain it caused me.
In the hours that I spent thinking on it, logic had definitely been ruled out as an acceptable train of thought. It just wasn’t logical to be one place at one moment and somewhere completely different the next.
Rationality, too, was out of the question. So, I stuck with what I had; what I could find was concrete. My senses.
I had always heard people say “to live in the moment,” well, now I have no other choice. Was my memory reliable? If I had suffered amnesia somehow, how could I know when or where I was last? Perhaps memories of my life up until this point were not accurate…
No, no. I didn’t want to think like that. It works fine in philosophy classes, but not here. Not if I want to keep any pretense of sanity. Besides, there is too much evidence on my body to confirm my memory. My clothes, my purse, my wallet.
I felt then that it was safe to call upon my memories as they related to me, but not to how I got here. There was too much of a blank. Amnesia, possibly, but I had never heard of a case like this.
As night fell and hunger gnawed at me, I dug in my bag and found a granola bar as well as a small bottle of water that I kept for long trips. I was exhausted, a migraine was threatening, and I felt hopeless. After a miserable time of not knowing what else to do, I collapsed on a grassy patch near the creek and, heedless of any dangers, cried myself to sleep.
Of course I can only assume I slept as it was a brief jump in time with no conscious thought, as short as if I had blinked.
Sometime in that night, I awoke with a start. Falling asleep was foolish, I told myself. Anything or anyone could have attacked me. Looking around, I still found the world around me a featureless field of tall grass and very quiet.
I relaxed a little, stilling my thumping heart. That was when I sighed and glanced upwards. There were two moons staring down at me in expectant silence. I began to laugh again.
That should have worried me more than the surprise of the second moon, and a red one at that. I was delirious; happily so, for it meant I could forget about logic and adapt to my new situation like a truly insane person.
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